To engage your reader, it's important to always show not tell the traits of your characters. The character trait "demoralizing" refers to a person's ability to lower the morale or spirit of others. A demoralizing person may intentionally or unintentionally cause others to feel discouraged, disheartened, or hopeless. This trait can manifest in various ways, such as through harsh criticism, negative feedback, or a consistently pessimistic attitude.

Possible causes of being demoralizing

You might want to weave these into your character's back story to build a more believable character.

• A belief that putting others down will make them feel better about themselves
• Learned behavior from a demoralizing parent or authority figure
• Past trauma or negative experiences that have shaped their worldview
• Insecurity or low self-esteem
• A tendency to focus on the negative and ignore the positive
• A desire to avoid vulnerability or intimacy with others
• A lack of empathy or emotional intelligence
• Mental health issues such as depression or anxiety
• A need for control or power over others

Behaviors associated with being demoralizing

You may be able to show your character's trait of demoralizing by using these.

• Using sarcasm or insults to mock or shame others
• Creating a hostile or negative atmosphere
• Constantly criticizing and belittling others
• Focusing on negatives rather than positives
• Blaming others for mistakes or failures
• Making others feel unworthy or inadequate
• Refusing to provide support or encouragement
• Ignoring or dismissing others' ideas and opinions
• Undermining others' efforts or accomplishments

Attitudes associated with being demoralizing

You may be able to show demoralizing through their attitudes.

• Dismissing or downplaying the efforts and achievements of others
• Constantly criticizing and belittling others
• Using sarcasm or snarky comments to put others down
• Undermining others' confidence and self-esteem
• Making others feel inadequate or inferior
• Being pessimistic and cynical about the world and people in general
• Focusing only on the negative aspects of situations
• Refusing to listen to others' perspectives or ideas
• Creating a toxic and unhealthy environment

Thoughts and struggles associated with being demoralizing

Here are some ideas for things your demoralizing character may think or struggle with.

• Belief that their efforts will never be good enough
• Constantly comparing themselves to others and feeling inferior
• Self-doubt and lack of confidence in their abilities
• A lack of motivation and drive to succeed
• A negative outlook on life and a sense of hopelessness
• A tendency to isolate themselves and withdraw from social situations
• Difficulty accepting compliments or praise
• A tendency to give up easily and avoid challenges
• Fear of failure and rejection
• An inclination towards self-pity and blaming others for their problems

Emotions associated with being demoralizing

Here are some ideas for emotions your demoralizing character may experience.

• Discouragement
• Defeatism
• Pessimism
• Disheartenment
• Despair
• Dejection
• Disillusionment
• Hopelessness
• Resignation

Facial expressions associated with being demoralizing

Here are some facial expressions your demoralizing character may exhibit.

• Crossing arms or hunching shoulders
• Avoiding eye contact
• Squinting or narrowing the eyes
• Clenched jaw or teeth grinding
• Heavy sighing or exhaling loudly
• Pursed lips or shaking head
• Frowning or scowling
• Rolling eyes
• Tense or rigid facial muscles

Body language associated with being demoralizing

Here is some body language your demoralizing character may exhibit.

• Frowning, scowling, or grimacing
• Crossing arms or legs defensively
• Speaking in a monotone or low voice
• Heavy sighs or groans
• Slumped posture and drooping shoulders
• Avoiding physical touch or contact
• Lack of enthusiasm or energy in movements and gestures
• Looking down or away when speaking
• Lack of eye contact or avoiding eye contact

Behaviors associated with being demoralizing

Here are some behaviors your demoralizing character may exhibit.

• Focusing on negatives rather than positives
• Creating a hostile or negative atmosphere
• Undermining others' efforts or accomplishments
• Constantly criticizing and belittling others
• Refusing to provide support or encouragement
• Blaming others for mistakes or failures
• Ignoring or dismissing others' ideas and opinions
• Making others feel unworthy or inadequate
• Using sarcasm or insults to mock or shame others

Growth and evolution of demoralizing characters

Here are some ways that your demoralizing character may grow and evolve over time.

• Seeking redemption through acts of kindness and selflessness
• Finding a new sense of purpose or direction in life
• Learning to communicate more effectively and positively with others
• Struggling with guilt and remorse for their past actions
• Forgiving themselves and others for past mistakes
• Letting go of their need for control and perfectionism
• Recognizing the impact of their negative behavior on others
• Overcoming their own insecurities and self-doubt
• Developing empathy and understanding for those they have hurt

Stereotypes of demoralizing characters to avoid

Try to avoid writing stereotypical demoralizing character like these examples.

• The character who constantly puts others down and belittles them
• The character who is abusive, physically or emotionally, towards others
• The character who is always negative and never has anything positive to say
• The character who is manipulative and uses others to get what they want
• The character who is overly critical and never satisfied with anything
• The character who is dishonest and lies to get out of trouble or gain an advantage
• The character who is passive and allows others to walk all over them without standing up for themselves
• The character who is constantly complaining and never takes action to change their situation
• The character who is selfish and only thinks about themselves, disregarding the needs and feelings of others

Negatives of being demoralizing

Here are some potential negatives of being demoralizing. Note: These are subjective and some might also be seen as positives depending on the context.

• They can be overly critical and harsh towards others, making them feel like they can never measure up.
• They may struggle to maintain positive relationships, as their negative behavior can push others away.
• Demoralizing characters make others feel discouraged and disheartened.
• Demoralizing characters can be manipulative, using negative comments to control and dominate those around them.
• Demoralizing characters can create a toxic environment and damage relationships, as others may start to feel resentful or avoid them altogether.
• They can be seen as bullies, as they often belittle and demean others to feel superior.

Positives of being demoralizing

Here are some potential positives of being demoralizing. Note: These are subjective and some might also be seen as negatives depending on the context.

• Demoralizing characters can provide a foil to more positive characters, highlighting their virtues and strengths
• Demoralizing characters can be effective antagonists that add depth and tension to a story
• They can create memorable and impactful scenes that stick with readers long after they finish the story
• They can challenge the protagonist's beliefs and force them to grow and develop
• Demoralizing characters can be used to explore important themes, such as the nature of evil, power dynamics, and the human condition
• They can be a source of conflict that drives the plot forward and keeps readers engaged

Verbal expressions of demoralizing characters

Here are some potential expressions used by demoralizing characters.

• Dismissive or condescending tone
• Using sarcasm to undermine confidence
• Negativity and pessimism
• Ignoring or dismissing accomplishments
• Insulting or mocking language
• Discouraging or undermining feedback
• Criticizing and belittling comments
• Using hurtful or offensive language
• Blaming and shaming language

Relationships of demoralizing characters

Here are some ways that being demoralizing could affect your character's relationships.

• They may be prone to blaming others for their own mistakes or shortcomings.
• They may create an atmosphere of fear or intimidation in their relationships.
• Demoralizing people may be quick to anger or become defensive when confronted.
• Demoralizing people may have a tendency to put others down or criticize them.
• They may be dismissive of other people's opinions or feelings.
• They may discourage others from pursuing their goals or dreams.
• They may try to control or manipulate others through guilt or shame.

Examples from books of characters who are demoralizing

• Dolores Umbridge from the Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling
• Nurse Ratched from One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest by Ken Kesey
• Cathy Ames from East of Eden by John Steinbeck
• Frank Burns from MASH: A Novel About Three Army Doctors by Richard Hooker
• Lady Catherine de Bourgh from Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
• Iago from Othello by William Shakespeare
• Nurse Annie Wilkes from Misery by Stephen King
• Humbert Humbert from Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov
• Joffrey Baratheon from A Song of Ice and Fire series by George R.R. Martin

Writing exercises for writing demoralizing characters

Here are some writing exercises you might try for learning to write demoralizing characters.

• Write a flashback scene that shows a time when the character was confident and happy. Contrast this with their current state of demoralization.
• Consider the character's physical appearance and body language. Write a description of how the character carries themselves when they are feeling demoralized.
• Begin by identifying the source of the character's demoralization. Is it a past event, a current situation, or a combination of both?
• Write a scene in which the character encounters someone who tries to encourage or uplift them. Show how the character responds to this attempt at positivity.
• Consider the character's relationships with others. Write a scene in which their demoralization affects their interactions with friends or family.
• Write a scene in which the character receives bad news or experiences a setback. Show how they react and cope with the disappointment.
• Explore the character's self-talk. Write a monologue in which the character berates themselves or has a negative inner dialogue.
• Write a scene in which the character takes a risk or tries something new. Show how their demoralization affects their ability to take action.